As International Friendship Day approaches, it serves as a reminder of the importance of friendships at all ages and stages of life. Naturally however, as time goes on it can be harder to make and maintain friendships due to being at different stages of life, lack of confidence or other factors.
For the older generation, it can be an isolating time if friendships aren’t maintained. However, we spoke with experts who explain the importance of friendships at all ages, the impact it can have on health and how to create long-lasting connections.
What impacts can friendship have on the older generation?
Jenny Lippiatt, strategic programme manager in the health team at Age UK says that friendship for all generations is of high importance. “There’s a lot of evidence to suggest that having social connections is really good for your mental and physical health.”
UKCP psychotherapist and senior lecturer and course lead at Birmingham City University, Kirsten Antoncich says the impacts of friendship are huge for the older generation. “I think one of the first things is that friendships are incredibly protective against isolation and low mood,” she says. “Being connected in a friendship and being listened to brings a wave of really positive chemicals to the brain.
“Friendship and connections can also bring a sense of purpose, which we know is essential for warding off low mood and depression in later life. We also know it improves cognitive health so the more friendships somebody has, it’s linked to things like better cognitive performance and a slow cognitive decline.”
Anton adds that friendships also reduce stress and enhance moods. “They are also linked to increased physical activity and better memory,” she says.
Lippiatt says: “For older people in particular, getting out of the house and moving around if you can is really beneficial for things like balance and mobility too. If you are unable to move around less, even having connections online or inside your own home have significant mental health benefits too.”
What impacts can lack of friendships have?
Lippiatt says that lack of friendships can lead to loneliness, and this is where you don’t have good social connections, which can be a problem for mental and physical health.
“Lonely older people are 25% more likely to develop dementia,” Lippiatt says. “It can also contribute to psychological distress, loss of wellbeing, confidence and this can subsequently lead to depression, anxiety and increased stress. Physical health can also be affected because if we don’t have the social connections or reasons to leave the house, it can impact our motivation to take care of ourselves and potentially lead to unhealthy behaviours.”
Anton adds: “We also know that a sense of social isolation can be linked to a loss of purpose which can then be linked to low mood which is incredibly prevalent in that group and population already.”
How can the older generation build and maintain friendships?
“There are significant moments at certain ages that mean it’s quite easy to lose friendships,” Lippiatt says. “For example, you might retire and often work is the space to meet people and socially interact, or bereavement occurs, which is part and parcel of the older age group. Therefore it is important to maintain friendships that you already have, whether that’s online or in person.
“Finding hobbies that either you previously liked or are new to you is another really good way to meet new people. Perhaps you want to go with a friend to a physical activity class such as arts and craft, music or simply going for a walk. All of these hobbies can generate friendships and are a good way to maintain them too.
“There are also often spaces within different communities for older people such as Age UK, where there are lots of social activities around different hobbies or just spaces to go where you can have a chat and a coffee with someone. There are also chat and tea groups within the community, so it’s really a good idea to have a look in your local community at what is going on,” says Lippiatt.
“If you’re religious, there often is a really good way to meet people through the church. It can be hard when you’re older and you may have lost some confidence to go out and try new things, but the people that run them are very kind, open and welcoming. If you are keen to do something, you might want to take a friend along or a family member to make you feel more confident or secure.”
Anton adds: “Look around you and look at your neighbourhood too. Connect back with your neighbours as we have really lost a bit of a sense of that due to the pandemic. You are absolutely not alone and you’re likely to meet somebody who’s had a similar experience to you that’s also looking for a friendship.”
“I also want to remind people to normalise loneliness. It’s one of the most common conditions in the younger generation too. We’re not so set up as a society anymore for friendships, and I want people who are maybe feeling lonely to not feel shame at that and to not feel frightened to reach out.”
